Jeremy Vine being a self-righteous cock

Screenshot from self-taken video of Jeremy Vine being a cock

(Note: I am sure there are plenty more and better examples of this kind of twattery to be found on the internet, but I can't be arsed to go looking for them. This particular one showed up in my twitter feed which is the reason I am commenting on it. I am commenting here because of this stupid fucking 140-character shit on twitter which is far too bleeding short to actually say anything.)

Stupid cunts like this get right on my fucking tits.

Here is a video which Jeremy Vine posted on twitter. (In case he deletes either the tweet or the video: the tweet says "Had quite a lively #LondonCycling journey tonight because this was the other one that happened to me: vine.co/v/MLOI7Lj9pI9", and a copy of the video is here.)

So, ignoring the unspoken "of course nothing I did contributed to it in any way whatsoever" bollocks subtext of the tweet, let's look at what Jeremy Dickhead Vine really does...

• In the first place, he is riding in a manner guaranteed to antagonise other road users. He deliberately hogs the lane, riding right bang down the fucking middle of it at a speed slower than the traffic, instead of keeping to the left and trying not to be in the way. It is plainly bleeding obvious that he is deliberately trying to block faster vehicles from being able to overtake, which is one of the many things that fall under the heading of "being a twat" and therefore is certain to make those he is keeping stuck behind him get pissed off. (That there is another stupid bastard in front of him also being the same sort of cunt is no excuse.)
• Thanks to a gap in the next lane over, his attempt to fuck up the cars behind him fails, and one does manage to overtake.
• The car begins to pull back in, arguably misjudging it a bit but on the other hand it would probably be quite reasonable if Cunty Jeremy was not being a cunt and objecting to being overtaken. In any case, the driver can't see him, as is obvious because there is no reflection of the driver visible in the mirror.
• Instead of braking and/or pulling over to the left, like anyone with half a grain of sense would do, the stupid bastard continues at the same speed bang in the middle of the lane to make some kind of retarded "point". He deliberately refuses to move out of danger because he thinks he has some kind of right to cycle like a cock and would rather the car - which can't even see him, remember - collides with him than stop riding like a cock even for five seconds.
• He then posts the fucking video on twitter complete with a smug self-righteous comment that completely ignores the fact that he deliberately put himself in harm's way, in order to gain the validation of sympathetic comments from other stuck up retards.

What the fuck is wrong with the stupid bastard? He is behaving in such a manner as to deliberately increase his danger level. He tries to pick an argument in which he is bound to come off worse if anything happens. It's even more stupid because he is doing this at the point where he's in the car's blind spot so the car driver doesn't even know he is there. He has this all too common fucking stupid idea that cyclists are some kind of superior being because they don't have engines and therefore all other road users should defer to them. He ignores the reality that cyclists' lack of engines makes them pissing slow and consequently fucking annoying to everyone else, and that their total lack of protection and dependence on balance makes them liable to lethal injury from collisions so trivial that the other party may not even notice. Instead, he deliberately rides so as to be as much of an obstruction as possible, and when a dangerous situation arises he acts so as to make it more dangerous, not less.

And what is even worse is that all this is premeditated. He has gone to the trouble of attaching video recording equipment to his head in advance because his whole intention is to provoke dangerous situations and then post the videos of them accompanied by self-righteous bullshit comments as if he was totally blameless. He isn't just being a twat on the spur of the moment, he is actually planning to be a twat and making sure he is set up to record the consequences of his twattishness with the intention of blaming someone else for it.

And he is also too fucking stupid to understand that posting a video of him being a twat automatically makes him lose. If he just ranted in words about some car nearly knocking him off he might stand a chance of being taken at face value. But when his own fucking video makes it plainly obvious that it's he, himself, Jeremy Vine, who starts off being a twat in the first place, then even if he doesn't manage to get himself knocked off he still loses the meta-argument which he is trying to create on twitter.

Jeremy Vine, you are a stupid bastard, a self-righteous arsehole, and a massive fucking cunt.

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