Orange and Mint


Why does every fucker who manufactures something that you put in your mouth which isn't food assume that everyone likes the flavours of orange and mint?

Toothpaste. Tastes of mint. Tastes really fucking strongly of mint. Plastic mint. Have you ever tried to find toothpaste that does not taste of mint? It's fucking difficult...

And medicines and stuff. They do the same thing only with orange. Cunt wanky plastic orange. Even things like Vitamin C pills which taste jolly nice in their raw state get afflicted with bloody orange.


I don't even like the natural versions much. I never eat oranges and I don't bother with mint sauce on my lamb chops. The fuckarsed plastic artificial versions of them are a whole lot worse because as well as tasting like orange or mint they taste like a chemical factory.

And what makes it worse is that both of them are flavours that hang around. They absorb themselves into your mouth and fuck up your sense of taste for hours afterwards. They not only taste shit themselves, they make everything else taste shit too.

They particularly interfere with the flavours of tea and cigs. And I bloody live on tea and cigs. Have you ever tried drinking a cup of tea after cleaning your teeth? Tastes bleeding foul, doesn't it... The same sort of thing happens to cigs. And it takes a fucking ridiculous amount of time for the effect to wear off.

It's not even as if there's any need for these horrible flavours to be put in there in the first place. Most of the substances to which they are applied, in their raw condition, just taste of nothing. The ones which naturally have a bad taste, it doesn't mask it, it just makes a combination which is many times worse than either taste on its own - a kind of taste equivalent of the way smoking while having a shit gives rise to such an appalling stench. And the ones which naturally have a good taste - like Vitamin C pills - it fucks them up.

Just fuck off with the orange and mint, OK? It's my tongue and I do not want your cunting stupid shit flavours assaulting it.

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