GROAN WITH TWOTW
No one would have believed, in the last months of Lord Justice Fauntleroy's summing up, that Mike Tyson's right thigh was being watched from a Portakabin near Charnock Richard services.
No one could have dreamed that National Service would be reintroduced.
Few people even considered the inevitability of being consumed by a custard beast.
And yet, across the Bering Strait, minds immeasurably more hip and trendy than ours, regarded a pair of Levi's 501s with at least two eyes.
And slowly and surely, they contracted foot and mouth disease.