No one would have believed, in the last days of the third term, that David Owen's left nipple was being watched from a public lavatory in Islington.

No one could have dreamed that National Service would be reintroduced.

Few gerbil hunters even considered the possibility of Boutros Boutros Ghali undergoing liposuction.

And yet, across the M25, minds immeasurably stranger than ours, regarded a young woman living in Kilmardinny Grove, Glasgow with unrestrained lust.

And slowly and surely, they cancelled their 'Newsweek' subscriptions.

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