DO NOT make your site rely on javascript. Because it WILL NOT FUCKING WORK.

What the fuck has happened these days to that extremely sensible standard principle of website construction which has held good since the bloody idea was first invented: It Must Work Without Javascript?

It is FAR too common these days to find that people seem to be not just unaware of that principle, but actively inclined towards its opposite. They produce some heap of crap that relies utterly on javascript for even the most basic and fundamental functions, despite the fact that the browser can perform these functions perfectly well through its standard built-in capabilities and it is much easier to write web pages that use those standard capabilities than ones that try to do the same things some other way. And by "basic and fundamental functions" I mean things right down to the level of displaying plain text, for fuck's own bloody sake. Why the fuck they do not realise that the natural and inevitable result of this amazingly fucking stupid idea is that their websites simply DO NOT FUCKING WORK AT ALL is completely beyond me.

Or maybe it sort of half works, so the website does partially display its content but is still too fucked up to be usable. It will be found that quite a lot of the listed examples of webshite have a considerable component of javascript dysfunctionality behind their shitness; very many of them would still be shit even if they did operate according to their originators' apparent expectations, but the mess they turn into because they do not so operate as a result of their fucking javascript not fucking working makes them that much worse.

And even if it does all work it is gruesomely inefficient and makes the page fucking slow and piss awkward to use compared to just using the standard existing functionality of the browser which uses some orders of magnitude less CPU than these idiotic attempts to replicate what's already there.

Understand this right at the start, you cunts: YOU CANNOT ASSUME THAT JAVASCRIPT WILL WORK.

Why the fuck even should it work in any case? All browsers have an option to disable it entirely. For that reason alone it is a dumb idea to rely on it. You MUST assume that the user may simply have turned it off altogether; and you MUST NOT fucking try and force them to turn it back on again, you fucking wankers, how fucking dare you be such a complete piece of shit? Eat my cock slime, you cunts.

Even if it is globally enabled, it is still highly likely - if the user has got any sense - that any given conglomeration of javashit code will find that things it expects to be available are not. Very often, for instance, it depends on some (gigantic fucking) library to work, usually because it was written by some cunt who is too thick to figure out how to do some really simple thing for themselves and instead C&Ps a couple of lines off some other fucking idiot on stackoverflow regardless of how many megabytes of crap the browser will have to download to make those couple of lines work. And they select some version of that library which also has code in it for doing evil things like exfiltrating your personal information. (Oh yes it fucking does. If you think it doesn't that's because you don't understand how very wide a range of things that objection covers. Putting up "social media widgets" is just one of innumerable such things that are commonly and ignorantly dismissed.)

So what happens is that security software detects the presence of the evil code and blocks the fucking library. And you MUST expect this to happen. Because why the FUCK do you think you can force people to download random evil shite to compensate for your shortage of brain cells? Maybe you're not actually using any of the evil code but the security blocker doesn't know that. And being too fucking dense to realise how very much apparently trivial guff is commonly subverted for evil purposes is no excuse.

Another extremely common reason it doesn't work is that so many stupid fucking cunts assume that the user is always running the very latest version of something or other and any functionality that didn't exist until 2 weeks ago is perfectly OK to use. Well you are FUCKING WRONG. All this fucking "upgrade your browser" shit is such a pile of festering arse that it needs covering in a separate rant, but for the purposes of this paragraph it is enough to say: it fucking well is not going to fucking happen, for excellent reasons to be explained elsewhere, and you can wrap all your brand-new-very-latest bollocks up in broken fucking glass and stuff it right up your fucking arsehole.

I will say here though that one thing that makes that particular piece of shitness a whole lot worse is all the stupid fucking wankers pushing the moronic idea that you always "should" use the very latest shite even when the established method performs identically. A prime example of this is the fucking syntactic strychnine in ES6 known as "arrow functions" (although when I first encountered these and tried to look them up I had no success until in desperation I tried searching for stupid fucking arrow shit). I have seen people on stackoverflow asking "how do you do so-and-so" and receiving a perfectly good answer written using ordinary normal function declarations. But then some stupid fucking cunt comes along and says "oh but you should do that in a more ES6y way" and translates it into some piss awkward piece of stupid fucking arrow shit. This wouldn't be so bad if only the stupid fucking cunt attracted responses along the lines of "what d'you mean should, what the fuck for you stupid bastard" and got downvoted out of existence, but unfortunately what really happens is all the other stupid fucking cunts start spunking all over him and thus the ignorant can never learn what a bleeding stupid idea it really is. Precisely ALL it achieves is to make the code fail to run on systems which it would otherwise have worked perfectly well on, and this is the action of an utter tit.

There are, as far as I can make out, no more than two situations in which the use of javascript is more or less acceptable:

But for anything that does not meet either of those two criteria: FUCKING DO NOT FUCKING USE FUCKING JAVASCRIPT. Fucking got that? Fucking right then.

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